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First Season Episode Guide

Part 1 of 4

Season 1, Episode 1: "Pilot"

Written by: Deborah Joy Levine

Directed by: Robert Butler

Original airdate: September 12, 1993

Guest stars: Kenneth Tigar as Dr. Platt;

Mel Winkler as Henderson;

Kim Johnson Ulrich as Dr. Antoinette Baines.

 
As Lois is celebrating her latest big story, Clark arrives in Metropolis. After saving a bus, yet trying to stay anonymous, Clark's interview with Perry is less than successful. However, when he takes the initiative and writes a moving piece, Perry hires him. Lois is less than thrilled when he is assigned to work with her. Nonetheless, they begin investigating sabotage of the space station which is about to go up. When Lois' date cancels out, she reluctantly invites Clark to attend Lex Luthor's ball, and she spends the night trying to get an interview with Luthor, who announces that he is building a private space station because of the anticipated cancellation of the government's.

When Lois goes to Lex's for an interview, he is more interested in her than being interviewed. Lois and Jimmy get caught while investigating the space program, and Clark busts in to save them but can't do anything without revealing his powers. When Lois thinks that she is going to die, she opens up to Clark, who manages to get them out without exposing himself. And no one figures out that Luthor is behind the whole thing. After all of this, Clark decides that he needs a disguise for when he helps people, so he and his mom design a costume. Meanwhile, Lois sneaks onto the shuttle to get the exclusive and finds a bomb. When Clark sees that there is a problem, he comes to the rescue, and Lois is in awe. She names him Superman. He then confronts Lex and tells him that he is onto him.

 
Classic Lines:
 
!.Perry: The Borneo Gazette? Mating rituals of the knob-tailed gecko?

2. Perry: Wait, wait, wait. Wait a minute. What happened to that mood piece I gave you about the razing of that old theater on Forty-Second Street?

Lois: I wasn't in the mood.

3. Lois: Kent is a hack from Smallville. I couldn't make that name up.

4. Lois: And, let's get something straight. I did not work my buns off to become an investigative reporter for the Daily Planet just to babysit some hack from nowheresville. And, one other thing, you are not working with me, you're working for me. I call the shots. I ask the questions. You are low man, and I am top banana. And that's the way I like it. Comprende?

Clark: You like to be on top. Got it.

Lois: Don't push me, Kent. You are way out of your league.

5. Lois: That's a typical male response.

Clark: Lois, trust me on this, I am not a typical male.

6. Lois: Oh, well, the man that I was going to Lex Luthor's ball with has the flu.

Clark: Yes?

Lois: Well, I was just wondering if you wanted to. . . . Do you want to take his place or not?

Clark: So, is this a date?

Lois: Date? Oh, oh, you mean like in Kansas, where you meet my parents and then you try and give me a hickey in the vacant lot behind the Dairy Freeze. Ha, ha.  No, this is not a date.   This is business.

7. Clark: Lois is, well, she's complicated. Domineering, uncompromising, pigheaded . . . brilliant.

8. Cat: Poor Lois, all work and no personality.

0. Lois: You are a strange one, Clark Kent.

10. Lois: Don't fall for me farmboy. I don't have time for it.

11. Lois: I said nine. I thought you'd be naked, umm, ready.

12. Lois: So, explain something to me. You eat like an eight-year-old, and you look like Mr. Hardbody. What's your secret, and can I have it?

13. Lois: I live by three rules: I never get involved with my stories. I never let anyone else get there first. And I never sleep with people I work with.

14. Lucy: Mr. Right could be right out there.

Lois: Oh, come back to Earth, Lucy. This is reality we're talking about.

15. Perry: When are you coming . . . out of the closet?

16. Lois: Are you saying that this is my fault? At least I had the guts to come in here . . . What am I saying? This probably is my fault. Oh God. I sometimes do things, you know, like jump in the pool before checking the water level first. But, Clark, it's the only way I know how to do it.

17. Lois: And the next morning, when I woke up, he was gone. So was my story. He won an award for that. Didn't even thank me for my "input."

Clark: I guess, when you're in love with somebody, it doesn't matter how smart you are or how many rules you set for yourself, you're still vulnerable.

Lois: We're only human.

18. Lois: I wanted to thank you for all your help getting us out of there. *** And, uh, one other thing, if you ever breathe a word of anything I told you in there, I will deny it and . . .

Clark: You can trust me, Lois.

Lois: Right, I've heard that one before.

19. Martha: Well, one thing's for sure, nobody's gonna be looking at your face.

Clark: Mom!

Martha: Well, they don't call em tights for nothin'.

20. Crowdmember 1: What the hell is that?

Crowdmember 2: Is it a bird?

Crowdmember 3: Is it a plane?

Crowdmember 4: Nope, just a guy in a pair of tights and a cape.

Crowd: Oh, c'mon.

21. Lois: What the hell are you?

22. Cat: I see it, but I don't believe it.

Planet staff member: What? A man who flies?

Cat: No, Lois Lane finally, literally swept off her feet. Too bad he's an alien.

23. Superman: Oh, one more thing, if you ever need to find me, all you have to do is look up.

 


 

Season 1, Episode 2: "Strange Visitor" (episode 3 by production date)

Written by: Bryce Zabel

Directed by: Randall Zisk

Original airdate: September 26, 1993

Guest stars: Elizabeth Barondes as Lucy Lane;

Joseph Campanella as GeorgeThompson;

George Murdock as General Burton Lukum;

Terence Knox as Jason Trask.

 
A government group, claiming to have a warrant, busts into the newsroom wanting to know what Lois and Clark know about Superman. Later, they discover that the warrant is phony. "Bureau 39" and Jason Trask are searching for Superman, whom they think is part ofthe alien guard sent ahead to assist in taking over the Earth. Clark is stunned to discover that the Bureau has information regarding his arrival on Earth. So he seeks his parents help and asks them to tell him more about when they found him, and Jonathan admits that he didn't destroy the ship. However, it is no longer where he buried it.

A retired general gives Lois and Clark the key to Bureau 39's warehouse because he feels that Trask is a zealot. While they are searching the warehouse, Clark discovers his ship and a mysterious globe, both of which he hides from Lois. Trask finds them and throws them out of a plane but not before Lois confesses to Clark that the novel she was writing was about a woman who dies without finding love. Clark assures her that it won't happen to her. Clark changes into Superman and saves Lois, but, when they return to the warehouse, it is empty.

 
Classic Lines:
 
1. Trask: Does Superman have any telepathic powers?

Lois: I hope not.

2. Lois: Well, look what the cat dragged in.

Clark: You've got the wrong idea, Lois.

Lois: Cat Grant's bedroom has more comings and goings that Metro Station. You're just another commuter.

3. Lois: Clark, you can do the horizontal rumba with the entire Met Net cheerleading squad for all I care. Just keep your hands off my copy.

4. Martha: Maybe we shouldn't have told you you were adopted.

Clark: That would've been tough after I started benchpressing cars.

5. Lois: You are so weird. Works for you, though.

6. Superman: I hear you've been looking for me.

Lois: All my life.

7. Lois: You seem, um, to have all the parts of a man.

Superman: Well, I am a man, Lois, just like you're a woman.

8. Lois: I mean, if you said, "I am here to fight for truth or justice."

9. Superman: Well, truth and justice, that sounds good. You can use that.

 


 

Season 1, Episode 3: "Neverending Battle" (episode 2 by production date)

Written by: Dan Levine

Directed by: Gene Reynolds

Original airdate: October 3, 1993

Guest stars: Elizabeth Barondes as Lucy Lane;

Larry Linville as Grover Cleveland;

Tony Jay as Nigel St. John; 

 
The whole world is out looking for Superman, including Lex Luthor, who puts Superman to many tests to discover the extent of his powers. Clark and Lois discover, however, that the events are tests for Superman, and Clark is angry with Lois when she steals his story. Clark suspects Lex and, as Superman, tells him so. Lex responds that, so long as Superman is in Metropolis, innocent people will die. So Clark decides to leave, until Lois talks Superman out of it without even knowing it. Clark also gets back at Lois for stealing his story by sending her on a wild goose chase.
 
Classic Lines:
 
1. Lois: Yeah, but not brown, brown. Not dull, insipid, mud-brown like Clark's. No offense, Clark.

2: Lois: What we've got here is an example of human evolution. Before and after. Clark is the before. Superman is the after. (Looks at Clark eating a donut). Make that the way, way after.

3. Lois' answering machine: Hi, you've reached the desk of Lois Lane.Leave a message atthe tone. But don't expect a call back unless it's about Superman. Have a great day.

4. Cat: I get it. You and Superman joined the old zero gravity club up on the space station, didn't you?

Lois: Excuse me.

Cat: Oh, oh, it's okay, your secret's safe. No one would believe it anyway.

5. Lois: We? There is no we.

Clark: How do you know that I don't have the inside track on finding Superman?

Lois: Sure, Clark, and when you run across Jimmy Hoffa and the Easter Bunny, why don't you reel them in too?

 

6. Lex: So, what do we know about Superman? 

Guy who works for Lex: That he can really jump . . . for a white guy.

7. Lois: I have never stolen a story before in my life. How could I do that? It's him. It's Superman. I mean, ever since he held me in his arms, there's something between us, Lucy. I know it. There's this connection.

Lucy: You should be ashamed of yourself.

Lois: I am ashamed of myself. I'm ashamed of myself.

Lucy: And you'll never do it again?

Lois: I won't. Never again.

Lucy: And you'll apologize to Clark Kent?

Lois: Not in this millennium.

 

8. Clark: Tell me something. Is Lois always so aggressive goin' after stories?

Jimmy: Does the phrase "Mad Dog Lane" sound about right?

9. Perry: I love the smell of fear in the newsroom.

  10. Clark: I don't know, mom, it's a bomb stain.

Martha: The important thing is blot, don't rub.

11. Lois: Well, what he can't do, it doesn't matter. It's the idea of  Superman. Someone to believe in. Someone to build a few hopes around.  Whatever he can do,   that's enough.

 12. Lex: Superman has a defect. He has a chink in his armor.  Superman has morals. He has ethics. He is unrelentingly good. Because of that, I will win..

13, Lois: You got the story, and you took me down a peg in the process. I guess I deserve that. You worked hard and you earned your success.

Clark: Thank you, Lois. That means a lot to me.

Lois: Well, I hope so. Cherish this moment because, Clark, you'll never experience this again.

Clark: Hey, Lois, what have we got goin' on tomorrow?

Lois: Now, there, you're using that word again, Clark. There is you. There is I. There is no we.

Clark: Not yet.

Lois: Not ever.

Clark: We'll see.

Lois: How long can you hold your breath?

Clark: A very long time.

 


 

Season 1, Episode 4: "I'm Looking Through You"

Written by: Deborah Joy Levine

Directed by: Mark Sobel

Original airdate: October 10, 1993

Guest stars: Leslie Jordan as Alan Morris;

Patrika Darbo as Helene Morris;

Jim Beaver as Henry (Golden Boy) Barnes.

 
Clark begins to feel as if the Superman phenomenon has gotten out of control and that no one isseeing Clark. Meanwhile, an invisible man is playing Robin Hood. His wife contacts Lois and Clark to help find him by writing an article about him. However, someone else apparently finds out how to become invisible, as well, and doesn't use the ability for good.  Lois is outbid for a date with Superman, but he tells her she doesn't need to bid for his attention.  The first invisible man comes to visit Lois and explains that he became invisible to become visible again but that he is not the one committing the crimes.

Lois, Clark and Jimmy figure out that it is Golden Boy Barnes and his gang who are behind the new crimes. Superman tries to find a way to make the invisible men visible, and Lois and the original invisible man go to find the gang. Of course, they get caught, but Superman saves them by pouring phosphorous on the invisible men. Superman agrees to do merchandising so long as all profits go to charity. And the invisible man goes back to his wife and gets a new job.

 
Classic Lines:
 
1. Clark: Does everything in life have to have a perfectly reasonable  explanation?

Lois: Everything.

Clark: All grounded in clear, scientific reason?

Lois: Of course.

Clark: No magic left in the universe?

Lois: There's no werewolves or vampires loose in the city either.

Clark: What about Superman?

Lois: Huh?

Clark: There's a man living somewhere in Metropolis who flies, Lois.

2. Lois: Eccentric? Try a taco short of a combo.

 3. Clark: You know, Lois, it must be tough being right all the time.

Lois: Yes, it is.

4. Clark: I guess I just feel like I'm losing myself to the man in the red, yellow and blue suit.

Jonathan: Son, it's the man beneath the suit that we care about.

5. Lois: When I was a kid, Lucy and I used to play this game. We'd ask each other, what   would you rather do, fly or be invisible?

Clark: And you chose?

Lois: Mmm, invisible. I wished I could walk through all those closed doors. I guess I   still do.

Clark: And what do you think you'd find there behind all those closed  doors?

Lois: Mmm, I don't know. Something different, wonderful. Something I don't have, can't have. So, what about you?

Clark: What?

Lois: Invisible or fly?

Clark: Fly.

Lois: Really?

Clark: Yeah.

Lois: You know, I never thought I would say this, Clark, but you and I have something in common.

Clark: What's that?

Lois: Superman. You wanna fly like him, and I wanna fly with him.

6. Superman: You don't need to bid for my attention, Lois. * * * You  always will be  special to me, Lois.

7. Lois: You know, Clark, not that I am one of those people who revel in saying, "I told you so."

Clark: Uh, huh.

Lois: But, I hope you learned your lesson. There's no such thing as an invisible man.

Clark: Yes, there is, Lois. Yes, there is.

 


 

Season 1, Episode 5: "Requiem for a Super Hero"

Written by: Robert Killebrew

Directed by: Randall Zisk

Original airdate: October 17, 1993

Guest stars: Dennis Arndt as Dr. Sam Lane;

Matt Roe as Max Menken;

Joe Sabatino as Tommy Garrison.

 
Perry tells Lois and Clark that they are now partners, as they go to do a story on boxing in which Lois' father, Dr. Sam Lane, is involved. When a trainer calls Lois with information, he is killed --by Lex. When Lois confronts her father, he tells her that he knows nothing about the death, butshe doesn't believe him. So she and Clark break into his office and discover the medical records of the boxers in the big matches. They also discover that they are building cyborgs -- part men, part machine. Clark convinces Lois that her father would be in danger if they printed the truth, so she decides not to print it. Lois confronts her father, and he tells her to write the story.

Lex tells the promoter that he wants to build an army of supermen. When the promoter tells Sam to make the fighters even stronger, he gives Lois and Clark the evidence. Not surprisingly, when the story comes out, Lex wants Sam dead and is willing to use Lois to get to him. But, to her face, Lex feigns concern, and, then, Lois is kidnaped. But, when Superman comes to the rescue, he is attacked by the cyborg boxers. Thus, it is Lex who comes to her rescue and kills the promoter who kidnaped her (upon his orders). And Perry decides that Lane and Kent will be a team for special stories.

 
Classic Lines:
 
1. Lois: Partners?

Perry: You and Kent. The experience of the battle-scarred veteran paired with the hunger of the exciting, fresh talent.

Lois: I am not that scarred, and he is not that exciting.

Perry: Your tenacity. His tact. Believe me, Lois, the two of you,  there's chemistry there. It's gonna make for great stories.

Lois: But, Perry, partnership, it's like marriage.

Perry: That's right. You've got to work at it.

Lois: It takes patience and understanding, a willingness to be supportive.

Perry: I know, honey. Fake it.

2. Jimmy: Lane and Kent, definitely. * * * Tradition. Abbot and  Costello. Martin and  Lewis. The straight man always goes first.

3. Lex: It's always such an embarrassment. Having to do away with someone. It's like announcing to the world that you lack the savvy and the finesse to deal with the problem more creatively. I mean, there have been times, naturally, when I've had to have people eliminated, but it's always saddened me. I've always felt like I've let myself down somehow.

4. Lois: Oh my god, Clark, I'm Doctor Frankenstein's daughter.

5. Perry: Get sales on the phone. Tell em I want t.v. spots, radio spots, skywriting. Let  Metropolis know that Lane and Kent are the greatest writing team since, ah, ah, well, Woodward and Bernstein, and they can read about it in the Daily Planet.

6. Lex: Well, I know you can't be everywhere at once, Superman, but I'm glad one of us got here on time.

 


 

Season 1, Episode 6: "I've Got a Crush on You"

Written by: Thania St. John

Directed by: Gene Reynolds

Original airdate: October 24, 1993

Guest stars: Jessica Tuck as Toni Taylor;

Michael Milhoan as Johnny Taylor;

Johnny Williams.

 
Lois goes undercover as a cocktail waitress/entertainer at the Metro Club to infiltrate the criminal gang who runs it, and, when Clark fears for her safety, he goes undercover as well, much to Lois' chagrin. Clark blows Lois' cover when they are trapped, but Lex doesn't and seems to want to help her by giving her information about Toni Taylor, the head of the Metro Gang. But Lex is really trying to hide his own scheme to take over the river area.Meanwhile, Toni is kidnaped and the Toasters, her arson gang, burn several places in the river area. Superman stops them, but Toni takes the rap for Lex.
 
Classic Lines:
 
1. Clark: Chief, * * * please talk some sense into her, would you?

Perry: Did you ever try to milk a steer?

2. Lois: He's a man. I'm a woman. Do you want me to draw you a diagram?

3. Lois: You will pay for this, Kent, I swear.

Clark: It's Kean, remember?

Lois: Benedict Arnold is more like it.

Clark: I had no choice.

Lois: You had a choice. You could have pretended that we were sharing some fleeting moment of passion. But you didn't think of that, did you? No.

Clark: No, but I'll remember the next time we're in a closet.

Lois: Don't even think about it.

Clark: It's for your own good, believe me.

Lois: No. No! (He throws her in a dumpster).

Clark: And stay out.

Gangster: Guess you won't be hearing from her no more.

Clark: Speak for yourself.

4. Lois: Jealous. Hah! That'll be the day. . . . (He leaves) I am  jealous.

5. Clark: But, tell me, honestly, you weren't the slightest bit jealous of me and Toni Taylor?

Lois: You'd like that, wouldn't you? Me, home alone in a schlumpy robe, crying into a tub of Rocky Road. In your dreams, Kent. In your dreams.

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